And I was completely joking.
I was joking, but I think so many times among other things, Prom and the events that surround it, get painted as inherently evil by adults, parents, Youth Pastors, and others who desire to see students be uncompromising in an event that brings with it so much baggage (read “memories”).
We have all dreamt or heard of the Prom King and Queen that get married and have a perfect life, yadda yadda yadda. But the reality is I was the Prom King, and I can tell you this: I didn’t get married to the Prom Queen. I’m pretty sure that I have the perfect life part down but… I kid, I kid.
Here’s the point of my post. I think that this event carries with it a ton of unsaid things that result in misinterpreted expectations because, for the sake of not offending someone, we hold back the true wishes or expectations of the evening/weekend. So, as a product of my observations and my own personal experience, I have some thoughts for a few different groups of people.
To Parents: Recognize that this is a big deal for some students and other students couldn’t care less about it. Take a moment and assess your kid and then move accordingly. Your inaccurate reaction to your student’s excitement could set you up for a very abrasive weekend. Also, make your wishes/expectations for times, locations, and concerns very well known (tactfully, right?
) to your student and don’t change them unless the information changes. My mom and I know a bit about this type of situation and I can tell you, it sucks. Overall, trust yourself as a parent. You probably have prepared them for this moment. So, surrender this one to God and have some faith that He still sits on his throne, even though you just want to hide in a hole until it’s all over.
To Fellow Pastors: Something that we cannot ever forget is how important our words can be to a student. We also need to remember the weight of our words. Let’s get something clear: PROM IS NOT EVIL. Just as money isn’t evil (if you believe that it is, I can help you with your “sin” problem), Prom is not evil. So be careful and wise to make sure that we don’t paint it this way. Sure, when the Spirit of God moves in your heart, give them your latest rendition of the “Be Strong” message or your “Refuse to Compromise” talk. But, let’s make sure we don’t deem something that CAN be evil as INHERENTLY evil. I have experienced the loss of connection that can happen when we swing the pendulum all the way over.
To Students: You are probably thinking, great here it comes. Listen, I want you to have a good time. I went to three Proms when I was in High School and let me tell you, I always went looking pretty fly. And while I didn’t really care what Christ thought about me and my life at the time, there were situations that either I learned of, or was introduced to, that I knew were wrong and did nothing to avoid. So, this weekend, when you start to have that inkling, deep in your personality and you know where it is coming from, can I ask you to do something: “Be Strong and Courageous for the Lord your God is with you.”
I’m not asking you to be annoying. I’m asking you to not care if you are annoying. The single leading cause for unplanned stuff on Prom weekends is because nobody actually did anything about what they thought that a given situation was wrong or out of bounds. So, when that person suggests that you go do this thing, or you go do that thing, and as soon as they say it, you get this feeling of uneasiness, just say it. Just say it.
This season brings with it a lot of potential for tension. Parents, I’m praying that you will stand firm when you need to and trust when it is appropriate. Pastors, let’s band together and lift our families and students up to the throne and ask, BOLDLY, for armies of angels. And Students, I’m praying for you that you will have a great time; an incredibly MEMORABLE time! That you will make easy choices because you just know that you are right and that there will be a sense of unity in that.
It’s gonna be a great prom season. I can’t wait to stalk the pictures on Facebook and Twitter. Oh, did I just confess to a felony?!
“I have the right to do anything,” you say—but not everything is beneficial. “I have the right to do anything”—but not everything is constructive.” - 1 Corinthians 10:23





